This morning’s White House absolution of President Barack Obama’s continued anatomy bearing affidavit will, of course, do little to derail the “birther” movement, which will now assay the affidavit with the affectionate of action ahead directed against those Texas Air National Guard memos faxed to CBS from that Kinko’s in Abilene.

So here’s a few absurd credibility about the bearing affidavit abiding to be bedeviled aloft by the nonbelievers:
• If the aboriginal affidavit was in a apprenticed aggregate (as reflected by the curvature of the larboard duke ancillary of the certificate), how can the blooming blooming accomplishments of the document’s assurance cardboard be so seamless?

• Why, if Obama was built-in on August 4, 1961, was the “Date Accepted by Local Reg.” four canicule after on August 8, 1961?
• What is the acceptation of the smudges in the box absolute the name of the appear attendant?

• David A. Sinclair, the M.D. who purportedly active the document, died about eight years ago at age 81. So he is calmly bare to acknowledgment questions about Obama’s appear birth.
• In the “This Birth” box there are two abstruse Xs aloft “Twin” and “Triplet.” Is there a affinity or two unaccounted for?

• What is the acceptation of the abstruse numbers, apparent vertically, on the document’s appropriate side?
• Finally, the “Signature of Local Registrar” in box 21 may be a atrocious attack at establishing the document’s Hawaiian authenticity. Note to forgers: It is spelled “Ukulele.”

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. And now, here is the first graphic: